Proverbs 28:23 Like Grandma's tonic

23 ¶ He that rebukes a man afterwards shall find more favor than he that flatters with the tongue.

"It's good for what ails you."

Did you have a grandma, or a great-grandma, that swore by her special tonic? A special preparation . . .a closely guarded recipe . . . it was usually a foul-smelling, terrible-tasting liquid that you had to be held down and your nose clamped shut, so you'd open your mouth to breath, and then there went the spoon! Gulp!

Actually I didn't have a grandma that made me take tonic, but I recall hearing her tell stories of oldsters who had some and dispensed it with regularity, when "it was needed." (Grin)

The whole concept of something that was at first awful, and then good, is one that Solomon is referring to. No, really!

Those who flatter people may please them for a time, but when they've had time for second thoughts, the flattered person may despise them for their dishonesty. Perhaps they've indulged in sin -- if they are later convinced of the evil of their ways, they will be ashamed of the pride and vanity they showed, and how easily they were flattered. They'll be convinced (and they'll be correct) that the flatterer did badly by them, and that the dishonesty had an ill effect upon them.

One who reproves or rebukes their friend may have to bear the brunt of that friend's displeasure at the first, but when the passion is over, and the bitter "pill" has done its work, they will respect their friend for the courage and the love shown to them. If we deal faithfully with our friend, in telling her of her sin, at the present time there could be harsh words and argument. We may receive no thanks for having done our duty --- until later. Our friend will acknowledge our kindness, our wisdom, and our faithfulness to them. Our friendship will deepen. 

No one likes to hear bad things about their behavior --- and if it is done with a self-righteous or pompous attitude, it surely will not be well received! But our advice to our friends should be based on our own experience, and on a knowledge of God's word. And it should be given with kindness, love, and a sweet spirit . . . as one who has been "in their shoes." If we are a true friend, we will be less concerned with someone's immediate approval of our words, as we are concerned with that person's long-term benefit and relationship with our Father.

We studied in Proverbs chapter 9:
Proverbs 9:8 Reprove not a scorner, lest he hate thee: rebuke a wise man, and he will love thee.

Kinda like that tonic Grandma talked about, eh?

Proverbs 19 : 25 A Ripple Effect

Are you like me, and you're dusting off the knees of your pants from last week's study with Tonya? She gave us a lot to think about, and a lot to pray about, too.

This week we're starting off with a lesson that could be illustrated by our throwing a pebble into a pond . . . it can be a very tiny pebble, but we will still see ripples spreading out from the place the stone hit the water, right? I imagine all of us have done that; when you were small you may have been with an adult and skipped stones on a pond, or dropped a rock or stick over the side of a wooden pier. Even a tiny pebble dropped into a puddle will have the same effect --- those ripples keep growing and growing.

Pro 19:25  Smite a scorner, and the simple will beware: and reprove one that hath understanding, and he will understand knowledge.

Here is where the pebble hits the pond -- the punishment of scorners, those who despise wisdom and laugh at instruction, is a means of good to others.  The reproof of wise men will be a means of good to themselves and to others.  Some people have hardened their hearts and will not listen to reproof or instruction, though it is for their benefit. Even if they themselves will not respond to the chastisement, others may see their plight and "clean up their act" before it is too late. In Deuteronomy, God (through Moses) was giving the law to the children of Israel, and telling them the penalty for false witnesses in a trial, saying, "And those which remain shall hear, and fear, and shall henceforth commit no more any such evil among you." (Deu 19:20)
In other words, the punishment was to be a warning to others; as the ripples spread out, they would see and not follow the same path.

The second part of the verse is this: the reproof of wise men will always be a means of good to themselves and to others. Solomon must have felt it was pretty obvious -- you don't need to smite the wise man; just a "word to the wise" should be sufficient. And it usually is. Once the wise man (or woman) has been told, he or she will take the reproof to heart, and listen, and learn, and increase in understanding and wisdom. There could be two kinds of ripples here: others can see how the wise person accepts and profits by reproof, and also the wise person can be a gracious instructor of others.

Proverbs 15 : 5 Scornful attitudes

Here is today's verse:

Proverbs 15:5  A fool despiseth his father's instruction: but he that regardeth reproof is prudent.

This is almost a companion verse to several that we've studied before . . . like this one:

Proverbs 13:1  A wise son heareth his father's instruction: but a scorner heareth not rebuke.

This one has a little different tone, though, and I'll lay it out here as concisely as I can, so you don't think I'm plowing the same ground here.

In the verse in chapter 13, the emphasis was on whether or not the son "heard" the instruction. The implication was that if you truly "hear" what someone is saying, you will take it to heart, internalize it, remember it, and value it.
Today's verse has the word "despiseth" in it. Some of the similar words for this Hebrew word are: scorn, abhor, blaspheme, hold in contempt. Whoa . . . there are some pretty negative meanings, there!  I think we can safely say there is more going on here than the typical roll-my-eyes-sigh-and shrug attitude of some teenagers that I know!
Contrast this scornful attitude that Solomon shows us, with the second half of the sentence: "he that regardeth reproof is prudent."   I hope that I am correct on this one, but I was really taken with the meaning of "regard" in this verse. It means "to hedge about, as with thorns."  Hmmm, if I remember correctly, that was one way that shepherds in ancient times protected their sheep.

Sometimes they would find a natural enclosure, an area where the stones could be used to make some makeshift walls, and pieces from thornbushes would be laid on top to discourage thieves and wild animals. If it was a pasture they often used, there might be a more permanent sheepfold made, along the same lines, with stones or a low building, and abundant use of thorns for protection. Many times the opening to this enclosure would be blocked by the shepherd himself, who would lie down and sleep there, to be vigilant over his precious livelihood.

So, this got me to thinking - I don't need to pat myself on the back because I'm not scornful. I certainly don't treat God's instructions with contempt.  But when I receive a reproof from my heavenly Father, do I "regard" it? Do I hedge it about and protect it, and treat it as something of highest value? I know that I should, for a reproof will guide me in becoming more like Christ. But I also know that if I'm honest, I sometimes shy away from that reproof, and try to justify my mistake or sin. This verse has "lit a fire under me" to change the way I respond to reproof!

Proverbs 12:1 --- Dynamite in a Very Small Package!

It's amazing how much can be packed into one small verse, isn't it?

On first glance, you might think the first part of verse one is about education, or learning, knowledge of that kind. But the second part of the verse gives us the clue – reproof is one form of instruction, and it usually is the kind that we don’t like! You can call it counsel, you can call it admonition, or constructive criticism….no matter what you call it, we just don’t like it, do we? How hard is it sometimes to say, “I was wrong.” I know I struggle with that sometimes; do you?

It comes a little easier to me now – years ago I’d want to crawl in a hole before I’d say it; I guess now I’m much more aware of how fallible I truly am!

So, the next time someone tells you that you might have a wee little fault, or could have done something better, try very hard to smile!  (Now, now, quit grinding your teeth! The smile is supposed to be the outer wrapping for your sweet spirit, remember?!)

Of course, reproof can also come from a sermon we hear, or from the "still, small voice" speaking to our conscience, too! I always have to remind myself that a very important part of prayer is just being quiet, and waiting on Him. 

It took me a moment or two to get my mind wrapped around the part of the verse that says, "he that hateth reproof is brutish."  I checked in my fav Bible, and the word there in Hebrew is translated "brutish," or "stupid", in referring to animals, and "foolish" referring to people.  OK, that is making more sense to me now --- if we hate to be reproved, then we are similar to the animals, who cannot reason or have understanding as we can. One commentary said we would be behaving like the oxen, "who kick against the goad." Fast forward through the Word to the Lord's gentle reproof of Saul, "it is hard for thee to kick against the pricks." Same meaning there....the goad, or pricks, were hard, and painful, and meant to guide the animals where they were supposed to go. Probably not where they wanted to go...they would have like to have gone back in the barn and slept! But that is what reproof is --- no matter where it comes from: the Word, our conscience, a minister, or another Christian. 

What will our response be, the next time we are reproved? Will we love instruction, or be foolish?(Please excuse me while I bandage my own bruised toes? Thanks!)