I Peter 3:1-6, continued

This week we are looking at relationships -- husbands and wives, employers and workers, friends that we want to witness to, and more. We are finding that this passage written to wives of unbelievers has nuggets for all of these situations!

I think that as we have studied here in Peter's letter, we've seen that authority and submission are important concepts.....the purpose of authority is to protect and bless those under authority. Not to benefit the one in authority! Because of sin, some in authority will abuse it -- God will hold them accountable. We must remember that if we must resist authority to obey God, then that is in line with the Word.
Another thing: God never tells husbands to get their wives to submit. All of these commands so far have been directed at the person who needs to submit in a relationship. A husband who is focused on his authority is actually out of line with God's Word. We will talk about this more in later studies, but a husband who suppresses or puts down his wife is not exercising godly authority.

We've found that the biblical spirit of submission is the attitude and action of willingly yielding to another, in order to please the Lord. Whether it is in our attitude toward our husband, or our relationship with a boss or a friend, attitude is crucial. Submission involves respect and a recognition of the responsibility of the one in authority. Rather than trying to scheme our way out of a situation with a boss, or manipulating our husband, we should seek to discover what they desire and do it -- as long as it doesn't involve disobedience to God!

I know that a lot of ladies really have a problem with "as Sarah called Abraham lord," but calm down here, OK? (Grin) Proper behavior and an appealing witness for Jesus does NOT require that we call anyone "Lord"! But here is the principle: the tone of our voice and the words we speak reflect whether we respect our husband, or whether we are in a power struggle with him! So many marriages are a constant tug of war.... that's not the biblical pattern. We are to do all we can to make him prosper. He is to do all he can to bless and protect us so that we prosper in the Lord. We can't wait, however, for him to come up to what we feel is an acceptable level of performance....we must do what God wishes for us to do, and He will take care of our husband.

Another attractive behavior that will influence our husband or anyone else, for that matter, is purity. That's an old-fashioned concept, for sure! Are we trying to influence a friend or co-worker for Christ? The word used here is referring to "abstaining from sin." This means that we will live in obedience to God; we'll be morally pure. People will be able to trust us, not just that we will remain pure in our sexual relationships, but in other situations, as well. We won't use deception or dishonesty to achieve what we want. We will learn to handle our anger and our frustrations in a biblical way. And our hope will be in God, so that we will have a sweet spirit toward those who behave in a difficult manner toward us. That kind of behavior is attractive to unbelievers -- they will ask what is the "hope within us" when they see our moral purity.

Another attractive behavior is reverence. In a previous verse, Peter uses "fear" or "reverence" to refer to our honoring God. I believe that is what he means here.... the idea is that a believer will live in the fear of God, aware of the fact that He sees all that goes on. To live in reverence to God means that we will think about that and live obediently to Him.

Watch out now, fair warning here. I will have to admit that I needed some bandaids for my toes on this next one...... Peter says that the difficult husband or the unbelieving friend may be won without a word as they observe the pure behavior of the Christian woman here. Oy. He doesn't mean that we go through our day not speaking. We're not mute. He means that we won't nag or preach to the unbeliever we are trying to reach.
Yup.
Told you that might moosh your toes.
Nothing will drive an unbeliever further from the Lord than a nagging wife or friend. Remember what Solomon told us?

Better to live on a corner of the roof    than share a house with a quarrelsome wife. (Proverbs 21:9, NIV)

A nagging wife is like water going drip-drip-drip. (Proverbs 19:13b, GNT)

I have been brought up short several times in my life with the realization that when I thought I was "just reminding" someone, I was actually nagging them. Whew! Not a pretty picture. Nagging does one of two things to the other person..... either they will resist and become obstinate, or they will just clam up to keep the peace. Instead of a close relationship, we will have a distant one.

We'll talk tomorrow about a couple more concepts involving our behavior, and how it can make the gospel of Christ attractive to unbelievers....