Peter tells the husbands! (I Peter 3:7)

Ya know, the first thing that immediately struck me as I was studying, is that Peter takes six verses to address the women who were married to unbelieving men, and only one verse to address men who were married to unbelieving women! (Grin)
OK, OK, you're right, I gotta quit keeping score.....
It actually does make sense, though, and I bet we will understand more after we dig in!

Husbands, in the same way be considerate as you live with your wives, and treat them with respect as the weaker partner and as heirs with you of the gracious gift of life, so that nothing will hinder your prayers. (I Peter 3:7)

We've mentioned many times before, that in that culture, women were basically considered property, except for a few exceptions that we've studied. A young woman was completely under the authority of her father, and then she married, went to her new home, and was completely under the authority of her husband!  So when you think about it, the concept that a woman would change her religion, apart from her husband doing it FIRST, well, that was unthinkable! Startling! Unheard of!
Peter was writing to these peeps early in the life of the church. Many people were becoming Christians well after they had been married. Just imagine what could happen in a marriage when two people had been unbelievers....and then the wife became a Christian and her hubby didn't.

For one thing, when his wife began to spend a lot of time with other people who were all talking about this person named Jesus, and she wasn't at home as much as he was accustomed to, it would have been perfectly normal for this husband to distrust this situation. He could get suspicious and even be jealous of how things were moving forward.
And for her part, think of the temptations that this wife would face now. First, it would be very easy to fall into the trap of thinking that she knew more than her husband did, about God and the scriptures. Satan uses pride to his great advantage, even when it starts with tiny seeds..... Secondly, she would keep seeing these other men who had placed their faith in Jesus, and she might wonder why her husband couldn't be more like them!
All of those pressures could cause the wife to rebel against her husband's leadership in the marriage. That is why Peter went to great lengths to advise these ladies of helpful, not hurtful, conduct that would make their faith appealing to their husbands. He encouraged them not to badger their spouses to follow Jesus. Because both the rebellion and the nagging would make it less likely (instead of more likely) that the husbands would become believers!
I think that is why Peter spends more time addressing the women -- in that culture, if the husband became a believer, it was just assumed that the wife (and the household) would, too. And if she didn't, she would be far less likely challenge or question her husband about his faith. That's why Peter doesn't take nearly as much time (one verse) to address that situation.

Since the same letter would be read to both men and women in the early church, I feel certain that the husbands of unbelieving wives would have been encouraged to avoid some of the same things that Peter told the wives to be careful about....

Like not nagging the unbelieving spouse -- remember that Peter said someone could be won "without a word." Once someone has heard the gospel, and decided initially to reject it, there is nothing to gain by "beating them over the head" with it. And it's not just verbal nagging, either. I've heard of some spouses who come up with some other ways to reinforce their wishes for the unbelieving partner to come to Christ..... playing the radio on strictly preaching channels when the unbeliever would like to listen to a favorite show or song.....running into the pastor "by chance" at the mall.....putting tracts in certain areas of the home.....even putting Bible verses on the bottom of their energy drink cans.
Oy vey.
That's not appealing behavior. That's manipulation. And I think it just might drive the person further away.....

Like not focusing on the externals -- this is another thing Peter wanted everyone to be careful about. We talked last week about not spending so much time on outward beauty that we neglected the inner person. I think that for the husbands, this could also be a point to be aware of....are we trying to impress others by pointing out what a great job we have? Are we telling others about how much money we make, or how many "toys" we have in the garage and at the marina? (Grin)  It's unfortunate that there are many who call themselves Christians who are trying to win others by focusing on how they will prosper if they come to Christ. But as Peter makes clear, that kind of focus on temporary, external things won't work in the long run.

I expect that Peter would say that our men should try to develop the inner characteristics of a gentle, quiet spirit, too. The kind of spirit that is characterized by "power under control." That men, too, should cultivate the tranquil spirit that we talked about last week. Not constantly stirring things up, or causing strife with spouse or with friends.
We'll continue this week with some advice for families, not just husbands and wives!